


Your eyes vacant and stained

by DoctorFatCat



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Angst, Heartbreak, M/M, Melancholy, Past Relationship(s), Relationship turns One-Sided, Showki, best friend Changkyun, breaking up, hurt!Kihyun, mentions of cheating, see this as my goodbye
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-28
Updated: 2018-02-28
Packaged: 2019-03-25 03:39:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13825686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorFatCat/pseuds/DoctorFatCat
Summary: Most of us are bitter over someoneSetting fire to our insides for funTo distract our hearts from ever missing themBut I'm forever missing him





	Your eyes vacant and stained

**Author's Note:**

> Based on [this song](https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/adele/someonelikeyou.html) and [this song](https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/daughter/youth.html)  
> And stuff

Kihyun isn't sure when exactly it happened, or how. He doesn't know why either, but he remembers when it began.

He and Hyunwoo had been in a fight, and the older had left to sleep at Hoseok's house for two weeks or so. They hadn't really talked for the whole time being, until the older came back home and apologized. Kihyun had apologized back, and the amount of relief he had felt was tremendous. They were making up, and that was good. All was fine.

But it wasn't. And deep down he knew that. He had noticed, of course he did. Kihyun had always been the observant type.

At first it was Hoseok texting him to tell him Hyunwoo had gone out during those days they were staying there. Hoseok had been keeping him updated, because no matter how mad he was, Kihyun was always worried about his fiancé. Soon the anger he had built towards him dissipated, and only fear of the older not coming back had stayed. When Hyunwoo finally did, the younger thought everything would be back to normal.

And things did go back to normal, for a week.

First it was the older using the pet names less and less. It was more "Kihyun-ah" and less "Baby" and "Love". Then when they were talking in their friend's group chat and Minhyuk had joked about Hyunwoo not talking because he was busy sucking Kihyun's dick. Hyunwoo's response was cursing at Minhyuk and muting the group chat. Kihyun remembers not being able to breathe.

The follow up had been when Kihyun had prepared one of the older's favorite meal, in hope to cheer him up on whatever was getting him to act like that. The smile fell from his lips when Hyunwoo had said "Thank you Kihyun-ah, but I'm not hungry. I already ate." And it had cracker the younger's heart a little bit, because his fiancé was always hungry, and would always make space for Kihyun's food, which was his favorite. And he would always also tell him if he would be having dinner out.

Hyunwoo had started to turn away from Kihyun in bed, and he wouldn't look in his eyes when he answered he loved Kihyun too. He'd sit an inch further away from the younger each time they sat down on the couch.

Then his fiancé had stopped wishing him goodnight altogether, and started waking up earlier to go to work before the younger woke up to make breakfast.

Everyone had noticed of course.

Hyunwoo would always give out excuses not to go out with their friends whenever Kihyun said he'd be going. He had started to go out on his own to god-knows-where, and Kihyun hadn't wanted to ask who he was with, because in his mind if he tried to trust his fiancé, there was a chance their relationship could still be rescued.

But a relationship doesn't work if it's one-sided, if only one person is working hard to make it work, then most of the time it's because it's not meant to be anymore.

And Kihyun will never forget how Hyunwoo had kissed him under the cherry blossoms during spring, how he had asked him to marry him during their summer vacations, five years into their relationship. How he had promised he'd take him to Canada to marry him if needed.

They had met each other at the worst point in their lives, and grew up and healed side by side. Kihyun had thought it was going to last forever.

When Hyunwoo gets home one night, past midnight, he looked surprised to see Kihyun there, sitting on the couch with red eyes and his engagement ring clenched inside his fist. Hyunwoo had never been one for confrontation, but it was needed, and Kihyun took the lead in it.

When they parted ways, the older didn't have to say anything, but Kihyun could see it in his eyes. He knew there was someone else.

He had tried his hardest not to cry, and Hyunwoo had apologized so many times he had lost count.

He packed up that same night, told him he'd come back for whatever else he needed later, with a previous notice, and took both engagement rings with him, in his back pocket.

When Son Hyunwoo walked through the door and closed it, he took Kihyun's shattered heart along with him.

Kihyun stops cooking, and going out. He stops sleeping in ~~their~~ his room, and stops answering texts. It only takes Changkyun two days to use his spare key and look for him.

And he knows, that with time he'll heal, he'll be grateful, one day, that they broke up. But right now, curled in Changkyun's arms as the younger tells him he'll be alright and that he's there for him, the only thing Kihyun can feel is the ache and the emptiness.

All he can do is sit there and hurt, hoping for better days. Because even though he feels like there are one thousand paper cuts all over his body, all soaked in vinegar, he has hope.

 

And there's no room in this hell  
There's no room in the next

**Author's Note:**

> I'm hurting  
> But I still love you guys  
> Can you fake it is being written  
> Please be patient <3  
> Hope to see you all there.


End file.
